In the vicinity of Buckingham Palace today, pitiful whining and the sound of knuckles dragging along the ground could be heard as self-styled king of the fascists Nick Griffin was unceremoniously denied entry yet again from the queen's annual garden party. "But I was invited, PLEASE let me in!" begged Griffin, to no avail.
A strong, malodourous smell of desperation and thwarted social ambition was described by several witnesses to the event - "It hung in the air like a dog fart" said party guest Mrs Gertrude Clungeworthy.
In a further development, we have been receiving unconfirmed reports that Griffin was later arrested at gunpoint and marched to the Tower of London by several large, burly men in furry hats.
Unsubstantiated rumours are circulating that this was the work of Prince Phillip who was said to be determined to protect his status as 'the only bigot in the village'.
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